How often does this scene play out in your home? You get that toy your little one has been eyeing for the past two months – you know the one. Every time the commercial popped up on the TV everything stopped. “Mommy! Daddy! That’s it!! That’s it!!”

It seemed like a great choice. Well reviewed. Educational. It even had some research proving it did x and y, and it would help your child grow up to be Grace Hopper (if you don’t know who Grace Hopper is, check her out). 

You buy it, wrap it, and gift it. Those little hands tear apart your carefully swathed package. She’s thrilled! Shrieks of “thank you!” and “you’re the best Mom and Dad ever!” fill the room.

Then it happens.

After tens of minutes, the toy is in the corner, your child has drawn buttons on the box in which it came, and is pretending the box is a space ship. 

Let’s explore the “why” behind this oft repeated occurrence. 

Children are Wired to Learn and Explore

First – this is normal behavior – particularly for those younger kids. You’ve heard it before – they are sponges, taking it all in. When the opportunity arises to apply some of that newly acquired knowledge, particularly in imaginary play, they will normally grab that brass ring. Dr. Tim Jordan, a leading expert on parenting girls, puts it this way:

Kids of all ages LOVE big boxes; you know, the kind that comes from that new refrigerator or appliance.  It allows their creativity to go wild. They can build whatever their hearts desire, using their own imaginations. They will make up games and scenarios that they play out; again, it’s about having the freedom and autonomy to pursue their own interests. It’s the same reason kids love a box of grandmas old clothes to play dress-up games.

– Dr. Tim Jordan

With infants exploring the world, it’s often about texture, sound, and sight. Crunching that wrapping paper, playing with a shiny bow, and banging on an empty box is just as rewarding as squeezing the new stuffed animal. In reality, the box, wrapping paper, and bow engage her developing senses in ways the stuffed animal just can’t. The infatuation with the packaging is a result of normal childhood development.

Check out these two cuties having a ball with their carrier boxes – basically ignoring the little stuffed animal.

Build a Scaffold for Play

With older kids, playing with the box can be an opportunity for scaffolded play time. Consider:

• The box is perhaps an unplanned (though we know it will probably happen) material for play.
  • It’s open-ended and flexible.
  • It can be anything the child imagines.
• Give them time to explore, to experiment with the box.
• Encourage that experimentation and exploration
• Ensure a safe space for the activity.
• When play is over, help the child tidy up.

Don’t fight it. The box will always retain its allure. I have a hard time not wanting to make the refrigerator box in the basement into a time machine, and I’m 43. Remember this: the box may have contained a really awesome toy, but your child’s brain contains limitless imagination – and that box is a blank canvas for its application.

You can join in, too. It’s okay. If you need me, I’ll be in my time machine.